Linda Studley

Can't Put the Pen Down…

Archive for the tag “fear”

To Live in Harmony

Everyone deals with pain. We all struggle with insecurity, alienation, and fear. Instinct gives us two choices; fight or flight. Wisdom gives us another choice: reason. Earnest, unbiased, drama-free reason.

To discuss a problem reasonably, dispassionately, with the only goal being a resolution that works for everyone, is not easy but it is always productive. It is a place where “I can” is more important that “you shouldn’t”. And it is a place we should visit regularly if we want to live in harmony.

When problems persist we need to look at our actions with an eye to seeing patterns, triggers, and habits that generate problems both for ourselves and others. Sometimes just acknowledging these things can help us overcome them. Sometimes we need to find ways to change the patterns, disarm the triggers, and reroute the habits. Be aware. Be mindful.

Problems exist in the present, solutions exist in the future (until achieved), and causes exist in the past. The only one we have no control over is the past so do not give it more weight and importance that it deserves.

Instead of telling someone what they are doing wrong, tell them what they are doing right. Build on ‘right’ rather than tearing down with ‘wrong’.

Anger is not an emotion, it is a reaction to an emotion.

Anger unleashed is the voice of fear, a weapon used to gain control, a vent for feelings of being overwhelmed.

Anger suppressed is the armour of pain, a shield carried by the misunderstood, a wall built by exhaustion and despair.

When you are calm, non-judgemental. When you are willing to look for a solution that works, not only for you, but for everyone involved. When the goal is harmony rather than hierarchy. Then so many solutions will appear that your only problem will be which ones to choose.

Smile and repeat.

 

 

 

All Saints’ Eve or Halloween, All Hallows’ Eve or Samhain

All Saints’ Eve or Halloween, All Hallows’ Eve or Samhain.
Tonight the veil is thinner and the starry night is prowlin’
with rowdy revellers, masqueraders, and jack-o-lantern jesters
who plunge their hands through the misty veil to greet their lost ancestors.

Do not fear the dead, my friend, they’ve better things to do
than haunt a house or frighten timid folk like me and you.
Fear more the ignorant living, who use the blessed night
to feed their need for power and greed by giving you a fright.

So here’s to those who’ve gone before, a toast to those who’ve left.
They never meant for you to feel abandoned or bereft.
And if the veil is thinner now and the date auspicious,
perhaps they’ll hear you toasting them and treasure your well wishes.

All Saints’ Eve or Hallowe’en, All Hallows’ Eve or Samhain.
if there was naught to fright before, there’s naught to fright you now and
do no harm to man nor beast, but let your heart be true
for the only evil you should fear is what you bring with you.
#109

Hats Off

Many women are accused
of having far too many shoes
I haven’t fallen prey to that
but I know I have too many hats.

The hat I wear when I’m at work;
in charge and self-assured.
The hat I don when I’m alone
and feeling insecure.

The singer hat is large enough
to hide behind on stages.
The ‘Mother Hat’ endows me with
the wisdom of the ages.

My friend hat is much smaller
and is more for decoration.
My artist hat is paint stained
with high-lights of frustration.

My writing hat is comfortable
I wear it every day.
The hat I wear to clean the house
I’d like to throw away.

But I’m happiest going hatless,
the way you taught me to.
Today I’ve made the time to take
all my hats off to you.

 

#7

Reality, the Illusion

The sleight of mind that palms
truth up a sleeve and
replaces it with hope and horror
and so the illusionist dreams
reality out of anticipation and fear.
Reality, the illusion.

This is Good Morning

This is my apology for projecting
my fears and frustrations onto you.
You are not a blank wall or a white sheet.
This is not the Can’t Film Festival.
No one’s getting an award for best angst.
This is life.
The only true awards will be the smiles along the way.
This is me taking a deep breath, sucking it up, and carrying on.
This is a good morning because we believe it to be so.

 

#315

Food Fear 3

The scarlet letter of shame today
is not an “A”.
It’s the “S” painted on the shaker of salt
that’s at fault.

The salt shaker top is littered with holes,
it’s hard to control
the amount of salt that hits your food
and you overdo

because salt is teeny and hard to see,
it’s pale and wee.
Not like pepper that is easy to see
and makes you sneeze.

Though pepper lives in a shaker too
the holes are few.
And though pepper is safer than salt they say
this is the way

we traditionally think our seasonings should be
but it seems
pepper should be in the shaker marked “S”
(for ‘Safe’, I guess.)

And salt should be kept in the one marked “P”
’cause it seems to me,
since we know too much salt is  bad for us –
“P” for ‘Perilous’.

#248

Food Fear

A soft boiled egg perched in a cup
with a jaunty, hand knit cap on top
and buttered toast cut into strips
to dunk so you didn’t miss a bit

of the bright yellow yolk
so smooth and delicious
who knew that eggs
could be so malicious

as to hide the fiend cholesterol
that would lead to a dietary fall
from grace. All I can say is “Crap,
now what’ll I do with the jaunty cap?”

#246

The Ticket

I think I lost my ticket.
Or perhaps I bent, spindled,
mutilated or folded it illegible.

It happens that way sometimes
when you hold it in your hand too long,
twiddling it, fiddling with it,
absent mindedly clenching and
unclenching your hands around it
as though the destination could
be absorbed through the skin,
a sweat stained dermal transference.
So perhaps it was just a transfer I lost,
not the ticket.

Wait, here is the ticket in my pocket.
I take it out but cannot bring myself to read
the destination.

 

#240

My Cloak of Bravery

How is it that you
can look into my eyes and
see strength and courage

But when I look in
the mirror all I see is
fear and cowardice?

It must be a trick
of the light and you’re seeing
your own reflection.

If I wear a cloak
of bravery, it’s because
you wrapped it ‘round me.

 

#236

Wake Up Now Dreamer

Wake up now dreamer
leave your nightmare far behind
know that you are loved.

Wake up now dreamer
your life is waiting for you
to catch up to it.

Wake up now dreamer
bad dreams are not sticks or stones
they cannot hurt you.

Wake up now dreamer
always I’ve been by your side
always I will be.

 

#235

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