Linda Studley

Can't Put the Pen Down…

Archive for the tag “humor”

Word Geek

‘Eye to eye’ means I agree
with you, and you with me
and ‘nose to nose’
might come to blows
though not usually.

‘Toe to toe’ means no holds barred
(There’ll probably be scars)
But ‘cheek to cheek’
is kinda sweet
when dancing ‘neath the stars.

So I’ll ‘be all eyes’ and ‘follow my nose’,
I’ll make sure I ‘stay on my toes’,
and if you call me a ‘word geek’
I’ll simply ‘turn the other cheek’

#113

Stompy the Squirrel

A chipmunk sat outside my window this evening
twitching his tiny tail.
Bright eyed, darting hither and yon
up and down the trail.
Then Stompy the squirrel lands on the roof
his army boots laced up tight
he starts training for a marathon,
and he stays at it all night.

A moose stood outside my window today
munching on willow tips.
Gawky yet graceful he nips and he nibbles
with soft, dark, velvet lips.
Then Stompy stops by and sits in a tree
and lets out a bloodcurdling shriek
a squeaked filibuster of epic proportions
that seems like it lasts a week.

A bear lumbered by my window one day
and peeked in as I peeked out
I jumped and he jumped and we both backed up.
I was too overawed to shout.
Then Stompy the squirrel moved in upstairs
and started to gnaw on the rafters,
scratching and scrabbling all through the night
like he’s digging a hole to hereafter.

So, do I like nature? Well you may ask
I like nature just fine…. Although
If I’m going to maintain my sanity
Stompy the Squirrel’s gotta go!

#97

Velcro Toes

Squirrels must have Velcro toes
the way they climb the trees.
And the way they climb back down,
nose first, is a mystery to me.
They jump full speed from branch to branch
with a chattering Tarzan yell.
And they just moved into my attic, sigh…
Damn their furry little butts to ….
#53

Hapless and Gruntled

If appear is the opposite of disappear
then it only makes good sense
that gruntle is the opposite of disgruntle
and gruntling the method whence

one would smooth the feathers
of someone’s disgruntlement.
We may be on to something here,
so for the sake of argument

let’s look at words that start with non
and mean the opposite of their root,
like nonviolent and violent,
should all words follow suit?

It may seem cut and dried but if
we continue in this vein,
disclosure’s the opposite of closure
and nondisclosure’s the opposite again.

And if a misstep is a failed step
it might seem apropos
that a mischief is a failed chief
(what he failed in I don’t know).

And if being a malcontent
Is being content’s opposite
then malignant’s the opposite of ignant,
therefore, ergo, to wit.

I love the English language but
my ignant’s nearly spent
and nondisclosing into
malmisnondisgruntlement.

#317

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